Trusting God’s Timing in Midlife
God’s Timing vs. Our Expectations
If you’re a Christian woman in midlife wondering how to trust God’s timing when life doesn’t go as planned, you’re not alone. I’m right here with you.
I thought my life would look different right now.
I look in the mirror and wonder who is looking back at me. Where did this neck come from? Whose hands are these? Some days, my body feels like it belongs to someone else.
I’m not entirely sure what I expected midlife to be, but there are moments when I think… “Really? This is it?”
I had an expectation that our boys would be living nearby with their wives and families and that they would be involved in the leadership of Oak Pointe Church.
But that isn’t how it worked out.
They’ve stepped into the lives they are creating and I am proud to be their mother!
Our youngest son and his wife and daughter do live near us, but the other two don’t. One son lives almost an hour away and the other something like twelve hours away!
So my vision of hosting the family for Sunday lunch, Easter egg hunts with the grands, laughter and fellowship around my farmhouse table is like a thin dream I once had.
I imagined that Mike and I would be discussing our retirement and plans to do some fun things while we’re still young enough to enjoy them. But it doesn’t appear our older years will unfold in the way I previously imagined.
I’ll be working at my 9-5 until I move to the nursing home, I suppose.
Ok. That was dramatic, I know.
But what is a Christian woman to do when life doesn’t go as planned?
When my timetable and God’s designs are different?
My choice is to trust and surrender to God’s timing and to let go of my own expectations and embrace the plans He has for me.
This kind of surrender doesn’t come from striving harder—it comes from abiding in Christ. In John 15, Jesus reminds us that when we remain in Him, our lives begin to bear fruit in ways we never could on our own.
Surrender Is An Act Of Faith
Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths
Proverbs 3:5-6 NKJV
Trust is one of those words that feels religious and righteous when life is going the way we want it to.
But when our expectations and timelines don’t align with God’s, trusting Him can feel like a challenge.
When we face this type of conflict, we have a choice:
Will we surrender and fully trust God? Or will we try to control the outcomes ourselves?
What Does It Look Like to Trust God’s Timing in Midlife?
Do any of the following sound like you?
- Retirement funding isn’t ideal, will I have to work until I’m 80?
- Where did the romance and pursuit of connection go?
- When will my kids begin to live for Jesus?
These are the kinds of questions that can keep us up at night. When our minds are anxious about these areas it’s easy to feel fear creeping in.
But the fruit of the Spirit is… peace.
Not a peace we manufacture, but a peace that grows in us as we stay connected to Christ.
It’s ok to consider the questions we have, to pray for wisdom and guidance, and to allow ourselves to acknowledge the emotions that surface.
But then we must surrender our thoughts to God.
If we trust Him, we will concede that His ways are higher than our ways and His thoughts are higher than ours. We will remember that He sees our lives from eternity’s perspective while we only see a glimpse.
Surrender can be a type of pruning, laying aside our own opinions and expectations to trust God’s perfect will.
Jesus actually describes this process in John 15 as pruning—a loving work of the Father that allows us to bear even more fruit. While it can feel uncomfortable, it is always purposeful.
Learning to trust God’s timing in midlife often begins with surrender.
Surrender in midlife looks like the Proverbs 31 woman. Her example for us is that she moved through her life in seasons. She provides us the example to be present and to make the most of every opportunity we’ve been given.
There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:
Ecclesiastes 3:1 NIV
As modern Proverbs 31 women, we can only live in the season we are in. Yesterday is over. Tomorrow is not promised. Choosing to live in the present with the peace that only God can give is the way we abide in Him.
If you’ve ever wondered what it really means to abide in Christ in your everyday life, I share a simple, practical way to begin here.
What This Looks Like Today
When midlife worries, cares, and anxious thoughts want to take over our already perimenopausal minds or when life doesn’t go as planned…
When my timetable and God’s designs are different:
- Remember That Our Hope Is In The Lord
- Remember Who God Is
- Remember Who You Are
- Remember the Promises of God
When we practice the gift of abiding in Christ, we learn to trust God more fully, surrender our timeline to His, and begin to see the fruit of the Spirit grow in our lives—peace, even here, even now—even when life doesn’t go as planned.
YOUR TURN:
What expectations about this season of life have I been holding onto?
Where am I struggling to trust God’s timing right now?
What would surrender look like in this specific situation?
Which promise of God do I need to hold onto today?
How can I intentionally choose peace over anxiety this week?
Friend, can you relate to this season? I’d love to hear from you—what is one area of your life where you are learning to trust God’s timing? Share in the comments below so we can encourage one another.
And if this message spoke to your heart, I invite you to join me on YouTube where I share weekly encouragement for Christian women navigating midlife with faith and purpose.
